But if you imagine that sending a daily barrage of texts, such as “driving to work, heading to lunch, or just left a meeting” is a romantic way to show you are thinking of your partner, think again.” To clarify – if these texts are used in ADDITION to phone, email, and actual dates, they’re fine.
I text my wife to ask her to pick up something from the grocery store when she’s out. They never pick up the phone to make a true connection, because they want to keep their options open.
She texts me from the kitchen to tell me she loves me. And women complain that men aren’t stepping up to the plate.
Appearing with me was one of my all-time favorite clients, Tom Pandolfo. We renamed him “Look Ma No Hair.” And we watched as his in-box filled up with interested women.
So, after hiring me as his dating coach, we set to work in rebranding him on We had Tom fill out my long questionnaire and submit to an hour of questions from me on the phone.
You can see what a great experience it was in this CBS Early Show clip: What I haven’t yet mentioned is that Tom Pandolfo is 5’3″.
But it’s not HIS fault if the texting persists; ultimately it’s yours. But if you want to see me, you’re gonna have to try a little harder. ”You seem like a good guy, Alan, but I’m not looking for a texting buddy, I’m looking for a boyfriend. Take care.” Don’t be afraid that you’re losing your potential boyfriend. You’re freeing yourself of the burden of waiting for an indifferent man to show you he cares.
If you accept that he only texts you, never calls you, never asks you out for a proper date, you’re tacitly CONDONING this behavior. Really, if he can text you, on Friday night at 10: “Come over, I miss you,”. There’s no reason for him to spend more time, more money, more energy, or more emotion on you. You want a guy to treat you like a serious relationship candidate instead of part of a harem? And since all you’ve done is text me twice a week for the past six weeks without any increased effort, I’m going to take that as a sign that you’re not that interested in a relationship. If he cared about you, he’d WANT to call you, WANT to see you, WANT to commit to you.
What incentive does he have to step up to the plate if he can get away with a minute of phone foreplay?
If you’re a regular reader, you probably knew that I was on the CBS Early Show in July. We wrote two new profile essays that were unique, funny and confident.
The real issue is that texting is ubiquitous and it’s not going anywhere soon.
Instead of using it as a way to say hi or let you know he’s running late, it becomes a crutch for real relationship communication.
These days, there are men who use it as the ONLY way of keeping in touch.
There are women who use it as the ONLY way of having a serious discussion. A first-person piece on concurs: “A short text in the middle of the day to let someone know you are thinking of them is a sweet gesture.